a little while between posts..

well hello everyone out there in the blogsphere.. =) sorry i've been a bit MIA for a week or so... school is back so i've been a bit busy with working, looking after the beautiful bubba and managing the weight loss journey..

feeling good, feeling motivated (still! woo hoo...) and have managed to shed 5.8kgs off my frame so far... so YAY me... i think i'll get super excited when i hit my first 10kgs, because then i think i'll actually start SEEING the results... which is going to be ace!

have been a bit stressed lately, Demi turns one next week!!! (where did the time go?!?!) and we're planning her party, which will be great... but also having money issues, and i'm trying to make sure i don't blow out her party with crap food... i think i'll be fine, but it's better to plan these things out... ugh, don't you hate money though? we eat, we survive and by eating healthier and not buying take out as much we're saving money... so it's not such a biggie...

am anxiously waiting for TTOM ugh... and have a feeling it's coming this week (of all weeks)... in the past i usually gain around TTOM just because of water retention etc so if i do... cest le vie! next week will be awesome...

hope you're all going well in your journey's..

xx

Weigh-in / eTools online

so yay! i lost another 1.1kgs this week taking my total weight loss to date up to 5.2kgs.... very happy as i know i have been good with tracking, and i have been allowing myself little treats along the way in the hope to avoid a big blowout and therefore find it harder to find my feet again..

so here i am... all chuffed about the effort to date.. when i put in my stats on my eTools online to be told that 'you're losing weight too fast and should consult a doctor'..... hmmmm... i've only lost 100 or so grams over the recommended 1kg range since beginning, and i took a week out because i was sick... whilst i love having the convenience of the eTools i don't particularly appreciate having a computer generated message telling me i'm not doing the right thing... i have A LOT of weight to lose and i don't think anything to date has been OTT.. it's not Biggest Loser loses, but i'm happy i worked for it and i'm going to embrace it... ugh it's either be made to feel guilty cos you're too big, or then have a computer tell you to slow down... meh..

rant over..

heh.. sorry... i am very happy to be over 5kgs lost though... and come on computer.. it's been over 5 weeks... grr technology!

hope every is doing well also!

xx

ah... dancing makes me happy... =)

ah dance class was just awesome.. =) it's great to have friends you can goof around with, learn to dance with and just support you... we had good times tonight... good times... heh..

it was really funny though... Meags asked me today how much weight i was hoping to lose, i told her roughly 54kgs... she almost fell over.. lol i guess my height has really camo'd my actual size and honestly even i don't get the gravity of the situation until i stand on the scales and hear the numbers... it's so weird to know that i have to lose a whole person.. and that's what Meags said... and when i got home i well telling my hubbi about the conversation and told him the number and he was like 'honey, that sounds like a lot.' as if i was going down to a silly number.... the ironic thing though is 54kgs gets me down to about 90kg, which is still not within my 'healthy body range'.... ah well... numbers, numbers everywhere.. the most important thing for me is to not get side tracked by numbers, yes they are important and i want them to go down, but there are other things that are important in this journey too... i can't get caught up in numbers...

anyway.. really looking forward to having a sleep in tomorrow.. and then radio from 1pm.. woo... =) love it..

xx

Weigh In Day

weigh in day is always a bit iffy for me... regardless of how much work i've put in, or not put in... i still get nervous about the results... i don't own scales at home for a very good reason... i don't want to be a slave to numbers, i know they are important and a good sign of progress, but i know how easy it could be to weigh every day feel good, or bad, depending on the result and maybe blow the week... so i choose to not give in to temptation...

anyway... WI was today... and after my illness last week and the NWP i am happy to report that i lost another 1.2kgs... YAY!! bringing my grand total to date of 4.1kgs lost! phew... it's been easy so far... in comparison to how it was last time... and my worst thing so far is getting in my right exercise... looking forward to dance class tomorrow... and roller skating on Sunday.... and i'm just so excited... new week, new focus.... =)

away from WI man today was a stinker... it was overcast all day but SO steamy! we've just had such strange weather in Bendigo this week that i'm used to the heat and sun, but not this overcast shenanigans... ugh... did all of our grocery shopping and unloading the car and unpacking it was a workout in itself! especially in this heat... i was sweating let me tell you! i'm happy now that the pantry/freezer/fridge are all full of nice healthy options and lets see how this week pans out..

good luck everyone!

xx

hmmm maybe not

just had the biggest down pour RIGHT when i was about to leave for dancing.... the roads were covered with water at least mid calf deep... and bubby woke up a bit distressed from the sound... so it all equalled no dancing for me.. =( i know it was safer for me to stay at home but man i was super dooper psyched for it... oh well... Friday then! heh

Hurdle #1

i like chocolate.... scrap that, i like sweet things.... hmmm and the nasty savoury things.... the biggest challenge i find, and always have found with any weight loss journey i've been on... is to not say 'well i've done exercise now i can do what i want'..... i used to do this and well obviously it didn't work... i know exercise gets me bonus points, and at my weight i get quite a few points for what i am doing (because even though i am big, i am quite fit and can do pretty much anything)... i remember back when i was on JC i would go to the gym for a workout, feel great and grab a couple of potato cakes for my drive home... UGH! why can't i stop this self sabotaging behaviour?!? nothing so far on this journey has been as bad... and when i have over indulged i've done my best to work it off with some exercise and make sure the next few days were immactulate... i'm just scared... when i have so much weight to lose i can get side tracked... worried about the big number ahead rather than pace myself and be glad for every little loss.... i really don't want to screw this up this time... hence the reason why i'm posting this.... i NEED to be held accountable... to know that someone out there is reading this and making me take responsibility for my life and choices...

i haven't had a huge blow out... i bought a fun sized milky way bag my last big shop.. (which was Thursday fortnight ago) and i only just finished them.... i was able to make them last... but today i had two, (the other day i had four... UGH!!!!!) i don't want to deprive myself because i know it'll just make for a bigger blow out... but i want to be sensible... hmmm.... ugh... at least i've vocalised it... phew!

gotta dash and get ready for my dance class! it may be thundering outside but dammit i need to dance!

xx

Weekend musings...

another weekend down... and i've almost been doing the ww dance for a month.. =) surprisingly, other than counting points, i haven't really felt like i'm missing out on anything... i've been able to live my life as usual and instead of blowing a whole day... working around life... which i guess is the biggest challenge..

went out for breakfast with my friends this morning, and i just worked it into my week... after my dancing class i had some bonus points up my sleeve so it was nice to get out and have some nice food but know that i'm within range.. =)

Benj, Demi and i had a lovely afternoon... we took Demi swimming at the local pool... well when i saw swimming, she's only 11 mths old so it was more splashing.. lol and i actually did swim... i haven't actually swam for AGES, but i did make it, without drowning and i completed 2 full laps of the 50 m pool... man i did NOT get how much you work when you swim... and i sooo took it for granted when i was younger and could cut laps with the rest of them! i think i'm going to try to do some more swimming... slow and steady.. a week of two laps.. then three and so forth... gotta get my fitness up with fun activities that i enjoy.. and the whole family can come... Benj just looks after Demi when i do laps... lovely.. =)

now just waiting for dinner to cook... hmmm am a bit hungry now... funny that.. ;)

xx

Dancing Queen.... (a bit older than 17 tho.. hehe)

phew... well i have attended, and survived, my first dancing class... and boy oh boy was it fun... before i knew it i was nicely slick with sweat (i know that's not the best visual image, but it was a great feeling)... without knowing it i was moving, exercising and really enjoying it... SUCH a nice feeling, i love exercise that doesn't really feel like exercise and without even realising it the hour was almost over and class was done.... i'm really looking forward to getting the steps down and i'm determined to do this twice a week as part of my regular exercise ritual... oh and the songs we're learning the chorey (hehe so SYTTCD) for are kinda cool  (although not my personal style of music), and very easy to dance to...

have also pretty much keyed up rollerskating for tomorrow... so sickness be gone! i'm back!

oh and on a side note, although not really a side note as it's an important note... i had my school swimming sports today.. and although they provided a free sausage sizzle (full of fatty snags)... i went the better option and got myself a fresh ham and salad roll and felt heaps better for it... also it was another important step for me in solidifying the fact that this whole lifestyle change is my choice... i had the points for the sausages if i wanted them... but i knew it wasn't really the way i wanted to go... and also not having the snags meant i got to have one of my WW yummo ice cream sundae things... awesome for a relaxing friday night after dancing.. =) ah, looking forward to the weekend... time for a bit of r and r..

xx

Egads, what a week

well the wheels kind of feel off this week.... certainly not by choice but i'm just calling it a 'do over'.... lol i got the icky gastro bug that has been flying around since before christmas... ugh i thought i had managed to escape but apparently not... =( so Sunday night/Monday morning saw my demise and i was unable to keep anything down until Tuesday evening... ugh... so basically no food, which means no tracking and no energy for any exercise! double pooh! but that's life... it's just what happens though, life.. it's not a quick fix so although i was a bit disrupted this week, once i started tracking again it was all back on plan and even though i could have been pretty bad under the ruse of 'well i'm not tracking, and i've been sick'... i am pretty happy with how i managed...

that being said i'm going to use my No WI pass tonight as sickness and weight loss may work in the short term, i really don't want to have an unrealistic idea of any weight 'lost' or gained because it's not really an accurate measure of any work from this week... so cleaning the slat, new week and looking forward to WI next week to see really where i stand.. =)

hope everyone is going well...

xx