well had derby training last night... and lets just say it wasn't pretty... as in me... i sucked... even harder than i did the week before!! how is that possible? ugh... i don't know if i was just in an emotional state of mind or what the issue was but i just felt bleh... the whole night... i had no confidence in me and my skating was worse than before... =( pooh... i'm not giving up... i'm adamant that i'm going to be able to skate again but it just frustrates me that in my old age (lol) i've lost my youthful carefree nature (if i ever had that.. hmmm...?)
i'm still keen as mustard to keep going to training and keep getting better.. and i know if i quit now i'm going to feel really crap about the whole thing... i'm hoping to get a general skate in on Sunday afternoon, even though it's school holidays... i'm hoping that without the pressure of other Derby girls around whizzing by me i'll ease up on myself... even though i 'train' on freshie night it's still hard being the suckiest of them all.... hence the want to get my skate feet on and find my confidence again...
got a lovely message from one of the higher upper derby dolls and she was great... very supportive and keen for me not to give up... that helped... sometimes you just need that push from the outside...
am really not sure how i went this week... my WW motivation seemed to have flittered out the window... double pooh though, i was SO close to my 10kgs lost..... we'll see though, WI tomorrow... meh... if it's a bad week so what... this is a lifestyle change and will take some getting used to... i'm getting there.. slowly but surely.. (much like my skating.. hehe)
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